Confession #5

I had job a couple of years ago where I knew that I was going to be cracking coconuts. It was for packaging so the creative that I was instructed to follow had a nice portion of coconut cracked in a particular way so I needed to match the creative as close to exact a possible. Which meant I needed to be a coconut cracking master, which up until this job, I was not. After much research, I figured out that I needed a machete. Ironically, growing up, and I believe to this day, both my parents keep one in the trunk of their cars. My father was a green beret, so he is always prepared for everything, my mom on the other hand keeps one not for anything nefarious, my mom wouldn’t hurt a fly, literally, she apologies to flys if she swats at them! Anyway, she’s always packin’ because she likes to find plants on the side of the road and collect them. Also, you never know when you might find asparagus in the ditches. But the ditch digging asparagus foragers on the Eastern Shore of Maryland can be rather territorial, so a machete means you mean business.

Back to my original point, I went out to find my own machete. Sorry one more side note, is there such a thing as mother/daughter matching machetes, if not this needs to be a thing. So, I ended up finding one, but with one issue, it didn’t fit into any of my bags, I was going to have to carry this bad boy strapped to my back.

So, my shoot was in Baltimore, like any city it has good and bad parts. It just so happened to be shortly after the riots so everyone was on edge, and there I was all 5 feet 2 inches of me strutting the streets with my machete strapped to my back, like I was part of this movie:


That day no one stood near me in the crosswalks, the usual street hagglers weren’t in the begging mood, and I had no fear walking alone in the parking garage at the end of the day. Although people’s distance could have been from the strange look I was giving off…me looking around rapidly like: I know you see that I have this, do you see the thing strapped to my back, I know you see it, look at. Loooook attt itttt! Confession: for this line of work you kinda have to be crazy in the coconut.